или 
Dear all,
In short, I wanted to send out some sort of Holiday Greetings to my friends
and colleagues, but it is so difficult in today's world of political
correctness to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met
with my attorney and on her advice I wish to say the following:
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an
environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive,
gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within
the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasions or secular
practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions
and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or
secular traditions at all.
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically
uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar
year 2009, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other
cultures whose contributions to society have helped make the world a great
place (not to imply that any country is necessarily greater than any other
country) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical
ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: this greeting is
subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no
alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to
actually implement any of the wishes for himself or others and is void where
prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.
This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application
of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a
subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited
to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion
of the wisher.
Disclaimer: no trees were harmed in the sending of this message. However, a
significant number of electrons were slightly inconvenienced.
Best Regards
